Well over 50% of 2nd marriages end in divorce. This is because men aren’t taught to take responsibility for who they are and what they create when it comes to love.
There is a myth that if we “find the right one” it will just work out.
I’m calling bullshit.
When a relationship ends, great men take full responsibility, learn, grow, become better and then co-create future love relationships that are beyond their wildest dreams.
This is part 3 in a series about How to Become a Badass After a Divorce or Break up.
Responsibility is an incredibly powerful word and concept.
Yet many of us walk around with a complete misunderstanding of the word. We’ve been taught that responsibility is about blame or obligation.
“Someone messed up and I’ll take the responsibility.”
“I’ll go to this meeting but only because I have a responsibility to the team.”
While this connection to responsibility is in alignment with some definitions of the word, there are other definitions which are about owning our authority to make a choice.
Orienting to responsibility as blame or obligation is coming from a victim or consumer mindset.
You are a creator. You take responsibility. The creator’s definition of responsibility is a simple break down of the word.
Response – Ability or…your ability to respond.
When it comes to a failed relationship, this means looking at all the ways you behaved within the relationship and making new choices. It’s about creating awareness of what got you here in the first place and learning to make better choices going forward…without assigning shame or blame.
No one is teaching men to do this. We are being taught that if our relationship didn’t work out it’s because we aren’t wealthy enough, or handsome enough, or good enough in bed. The reality is much more complex than that.
We are taught that we just need to either learn to perform masculinity better or to just select a better 2nd wife.
This is more bullshit.
It’s time to take a deep look at yourself. Learn about who you are. Understand your behaviors and choices. Become a student of love, relationship, sexuality, communication, and attraction.
It’s time to take responsibility from a mature place and go out and create a life that you absolutely fucking, love.
I help men do that. It’s your turn.
Stay tuned for the next installment on returning to the body. (What the F does that mean?)
If you have experienced a divorce, break up or lack of quality love relationships and you know you want help becoming a badass, apply to work with me.